


verity

by idacarvalli



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bonding, Dean and Jack bonding, Deancas angst, Empty deal, Father and Son, TFW 2.0, Team Free Will, and fluff too idrk, anyway i'm fucked for 15x18, canon divergence (maybe), dean is yelling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:21:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26202583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idacarvalli/pseuds/idacarvalli
Summary: The dark-haired angel lifts his head; his eyes meet Dean’s, and in them is immeasurable sadness. “You fought for the whole world.”Dean swallows because he knows what’s coming next. Behind him, he hears Jack crying quietly.“You don’t have to fight for me too.”
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel & Jack Kline & Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Castiel & Sam Winchester, Jack Kline & Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 55





	verity

**Author's Note:**

> This is posted on my tumblr @paladeckies as well, you can read it there. Anyway I wanted to write a drabble for 15x18 (let's go clowns). I haven't written fanfic in a while so please excuse the quality of this lmao. Kudos and comments are always appreciated and I'd love to hear what you think is gonna happen in the last seven episodes.

Jack’s sitting across the table from Dean, picking quietly at a chip in the wood. Dean glanced away from him towards the door, which hung ajar and led into an empty hallway. Dean sighed and turned back to Jack, who had stopped playing with the table. 

“Hey, kid,” he says. Jack looked up, eyeing him warily. It had been a while since he had gotten his soul back and most days he sat in his room, talking to nobody but Castiel.

“Yeah?” replies Jack. Dean thrums his fingers on the table, trying to think of what to say next.

Sam had done it so much better than he had. The minute Jack had come back with Cas, it was like none of it had ever happened for his brother. He forgave him immediately, with only a few quick words exchanged between them.

Dean wanted to say it was okay and move on but it _wasn’t_. And he knew that Jack wasn’t Jack when he did what he did and he should be able to forgive him but he couldn’t bring himself to say it. Because Dean understood; Sam had done terrible, terrible things while soulless and if he was able to forgive his brother, why couldn’t he forgive the kid? Dean put his hand over his face.

_He killed Mom._

When his hands came down, Jack was still sitting there awkwardly, looking very out of place. “Dean?”

“Right,” says Dean. “Jack, I’ve got something to say to you.”

He could see Jack’s throat constricting, tightening at the collar bone. The hands that sat on the table were shaking, and Dean could see it because he had been in Jack’s position before. Multiple times.

“What is it?” asks Jack quietly.

_I forgive you._

“What you did, Jack,” Dean starts, and he measured his words carefully because this could easily take a turn for the worse. “Isn’t something that I can just forget about.” He saw Jack nod, quick and small. “And I know that wasn’t you.”

Something flashes in the kid’s eyes.

“And I know how sorry you are,” he continues. “I know you’d do anything to fix it. But there are some things you can’t put in the past, Jack.” 

“I understand.”

It’s so fast, so quiet that Dean barely hears it. “What?” he asks. 

“I understand,” Jack repeats, more forcefully this time. “You did what you had to do and I can’t hold that against you.”

Dean frowns. “Why would you think that?”

Confusion edges its way into Jack’s face. “Isn’t that why you’re talking to me? To say that you’d never forgive me?”

Dean doesn’t know how to respond to that. He doesn’t say anything for a moment and tries to gather his thoughts again. “No. That’s not why.”

Jack tilts his head in a very Cas-like fashion.

Dean sighs and brings his clasped hands up to his chin. “I’m talking to you because... because I have some apologies to make myself.”

Jack opens his mouth to speak, but Dean brings a finger up to shush him. “What you did, yeah. It was bad. Terrible. But it wasn’t you.” Dean pauses, looking for the right words. 

“What I did- well, that was me. And I don’t know why I did it. I don’t. I tried to kill you, Jack. I tried to _kill_ you.”

Dean can feel his bottom lip trembling. Hot tears sting the back of his eyes, and he blinks them back because he doesn’t want the kid to see him like this. So he takes a shaky breath and presses forward. 

“And there’s absolutely no excuse for that. None. And I am so, so sorry that it took me so long to say it.”

Jack looks like he’s about to cry. His eyes are swimming and his jaw is clenched tight. Wonderful.

“I’m so sorry, kid.”

There’s a long, uncomfortable pause. Dean searches Jack’s face, for some sign of a reaction, _something_. But Jack doesn’t say anything.

Instead, his face breaks out into the biggest, brightest smile Dean has ever seen.

Jack practically leaps out of his chair and pounces on Dean, wrapping his skinny arms around Dean’s shoulders. He chuckles and hugs Jack back, although only with one arm. 

“This is great!” says Jack, practically bouncing. “I’m gonna go tell Sam and Cas.”

“Well, only if I get to come with,” Dean says, and lifts himself out of his seat. He follows a skipping Jack out the door.

* * *

Sam and Cas are sitting in the war room; the latter is going through a large book when Dean and Jack enter. Sam looks up at the commotion.

“What’s got you two so happy?” he asks, grinning slightly (most likely out of confusion). 

“Dean and I are okay now!” says Jack, smiling like an idiot. 

“Really?” says Sam. Cas closes his book and nods slowly. He doesn’t meet their eyes. 

“Yeah,” Dean says. “I mean, who can stay mad at this kid?”

Sam chuckles. “Well, that’s good to hear, I guess. Knew you two’d come around eventually.”

“Did you now?” asks Dean, raising an eyebrow. Sam shrugs.

“I’m glad we’re okay, Dean,” says Jack, and his words are rushed and breathy. “Because I wouldn’t want to kill God without us being a family again, but I don’t know how long that will be possible because of Cas’ deal with the Empty-”

_The what._

Dean’s head whirls around to Castiel, whose back is turned. He still won’t meet anyone’s eyes.

“Cas,” says Sam, very slowly. “What _deal_?”

Cas stays silent.

“ _CAS!”_ shouts Dean, pushing Jack aside to get to the angel. “ _WHAT DEAL?”_

Castiel turns around very slowly. His eyes are sad. He says nothing.

“ _What did you do_?” asks Sam. Dean hears the clatter of his chair. 

There’s still no response. Dean sighs. “Cas, buddy, what deal was Jack talking about?” Dean’s not even paying attention to the kid anymore because the most important thing is his angel, here, in front of him. 

“I don’t regret my decision,” Cas says, after a long silence. “I made a deal with the Empty.”

“Yeah, we know,” says Sam, sounding very annoyed. “When did this happen?”

“When Jack died,” Castiel continues. He sits on the table, shoulders slumped. “When I- when I went to heaven to find him.”

Dean doesn’t know how to respond to that. 

Because he would have done the exact same thing.

“Well, there must be some way to fix this,” Sam says, sounding close to tears. “I mean- we could- I could look in the library.”

“There won’t be anything in the library, Sam,” Cas replies. His voice is the most hopeless Dean has ever heard, which is crazy, because they could still fix this- no, they _had_ to fix this. “It’s too late. I told you, I’m at peace with my choice.”

“Damn it, Cas!” Dean threw his hands in his hair and pulled, ignoring the sharp, stabbing pain that came with it. He felt tears stinging the back of his eyes again, hot and sharp. “We’ll fix this. We will.”

“Dean, don’t-”

“Cas, we have to fix this. You’re my- you’re our family,” says Dean, and his chest is heaving, he’s panting and he doesn’t know why. “We have to save you.”

The dark-haired angel lifts his head; his eyes meet Dean’s, and in them is immeasurable sadness. “You fought for the whole world.”

Dean swallows because he knows what’s coming next. Behind him, he hears Jack crying quietly.

“You don’t have to fight for me too.”


End file.
